bertall | Iɴʙᴏx ✉ Vɪᴄᴛᴏʀʏ Rᴏᴀᴅ

[ This second message comes after a short delay. She debates sending it at all; but it's Bertolt swearing on his father's name that makes her hit enter to send, in the end. ]

Thank you.

[ And nothing else. No claims about how his father would feel, or what he'll do with Bertolt gone, or what will happen, or anything of the sort. It's not relevant, and it would be empty anyway.

Just thank you. For giving her something to believe in, even if it's just an ass-covering move to not have to endure the mess with Marco ever again. ]

_{[He'll do everything he can to keep it. He's already proven to himself that if he truly sets his mind to something, he's capable of carrying it out.

At least until his heart gets in the way, then it's debatable. Shiganshina was proof enough, but at least here he doesn't have to worry about things like that. If Bertolt has to, he'll get Marcel to try kidnapping Reiner or use him to act as a barrier until he can diffuse the situation or get him away.

He can't lose any of this.]}

I couldn't keep anyone safe back there, but I'm going to here. Just... remember that, okay? If I ever miss something, please tell me so I can try to fix it.

_{["Let me be the Warrior I should've been."

After a few moments, he adds;]}

Will you be okay?

[ Hearts confusing lines of action, making them act in ways that are both to their benefit as human beings, but their detriment as warriors... they both know something of that, don't they? ]

If I notice, I will.

As okay as I'll ever be. Blood doesn't rinse off with water. I've known that for a long time, like we all have. I'll keep living with it just as I was before.

[ The nightmares are part and parcel. She doesn't have to like them to know they're as fully hers as the memories she wishes she could forget.

Nightmares in their own way are a measure of her humanity. A shitty one, but a measure nonetheless. Hers can't be any worse than Bertolt's. There's a twisted kind of comfort in that. ]

You?

Edited 2018-10-14 11:03 (UTC)

_{[It's a double-edged sword. They want to protect, but they have to destroy. It's not fair.]}

I'm here if you need someone to talk to.

But

_{[He casts another look towards Jean and Marco's direction and frowns to himself.]}

We'll see on my end. I'm hoping it'll be okay.

[ The refrain of their lives, for a long as Annie remembers. None of it has ever been fair. ]

I won't promise I'm any good at advice, but I can listen. Especially given your situation... if you need the outlet, I'm here on this, if nothing else.

How are you handling the new division of Jean's attention?

[ She's not sure how to phrase it otherwise, but it wasn't a secret how Jean and Marco had been close in their training years. Jean's also in the weird position Bertolt is for Annie: not the dead one, but the older and growing up without the defining pressures from home warping them to fit particular molds. That Marco has died adds another layer of complicated emotion, but the end result is there's years between them that can't be made up for without concessions on both sides.

She's thankful, in her own way, she's always held to being a lone wolf. Aside from Bertolt with his outside interests, and Armin with his own, she doesn't have to worry about being sought out by people from home. It's not what anyone expects from her. It's not what they want. She doesn't expect Marco to be any different. ]

You're plenty good. I'm just thick-headed sometimes. I still appreciate it though, and I hope you know that.

_{[Dumb boys will forever be dumb boys, but he does value her input. It's good to have another set of eyes on this whole situation, even if he doesn't like to admit it and acknowledge that she may be onto something.]}

We'll see on that front, too. Right now it...

I'm not sure.

I'm nervous.

Who isn't? Like I've said, there's plenty I point out when I can finally be bothered to speak up, then find it all goes ignored. I hardly expect people to act different than they do.

[ Dumb boys especially. Really, she's more impressed when they listen--this is part of why Eren caught her attention. He wasn't particularly brilliant by any stretch of the imagination, but he heard... at times. Eventually. ]

Do you want any comment on what I saw while enduring your moving home with the two of you, or not?

Would it help if I said I'd try to listen more?

_{[Her next comment gives him pause, and he types 'no' at first. He keeps re-reading it, and after another moment of thought he deletes it.

It might be better to actually hear it.]}

One, the moving does take some getting used to so I'll give you that. Two, I... go ahead.

Words are words. They're easy to say, less easy to mean.

[ Act, and she'll notice the difference. Which she supposes is what he's attempting to do, though she doesn't hold her breath as she types a response. ]

It was more the stench.

[ Blunt. ]

His eyes look up to find you, he tracks what you're doing, he smiles when he sees you, he predicts little things that you might need. He cares. He's attracted. That won't stop or drastically change with Marco being here.

What you choose to do with that, or if you choose to accept that, is up to you. But it isn't subtle.

What stench?

_{[This is what they call nose blind.

He finds himself taking a big ol' whiff to see if he can smell anything, and he comes up with nothing. To Bertolt, everything smells the way it always has.

Everything else she says though... He finds himself slumping against his wall, and there's no doubt that his ears are starting to burn again - if Jean or Marco were to look in, they'd know something was getting him flustered.

Has that really been happening? How blind is he?]}

You're serious?

The one like strong cologne and not-quite washed enough body odour.

[ It's very Male, though hardly exclusive to guys. Their train car could stand a better deep cleaning and regular airing out, and a cease fire on whatever perfume they coated themselves in every day. ]

Yes. One of my many faults.

Do I smell??

_{[Annie. Annie. Do not make him sniff himself. Please.]}

I'd

hardly count that as a fault. Especially if you think it's 100%.

Edited 2018-10-15 05:02 (UTC)

Bertolt, contrary to what it sounds like, I didn't spend time personally smelling either you or Jean. Besides, you bathe, don't you? How often do you do laundry? Do you even use cologne? Strongly scented body soaps?

[ Don't ask her these things, Bertolt, you don't want the answers. ]

I'm certain of my assessment of Jean when it comes to you. As for being serious to a fault, maybe not, but I'm hardly going to be accused of being light-hearted.

Iɴʙᴏx ✉ Vɪᴄᴛᴏʀʏ Rᴏᴀᴅ

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